Monday, February 02, 2009

Winter whine

Is it just me? Am I too much of an idiot who won't pay for a dog massage, stay-at-home wife parasite, bitter-clinger hothouse flower?

SH and I went out to supper Saturday night. I wore my new (to me) clubbed baby seal fur coat that is just adorable except it has very wide arms and hits me just at the waist and doesn't stay closed unless I hold it closed, which means that it is more decorative than functional, which is just fine with me except it was really cold (although it got above freezing for the first time in three weeks) and windy on Saturday and after a few gusts off the lake, I decided I'd rather be warm than cute but by then it was too late.

The other thing that is not adorable about the coat is that it sheds. Never having bought fur before, I didn't realize that one should not buy a fur jacket that crackles. Fur is supposed to be supple, not rigid, which is probably why the soft, supple fox stole displayed next to the jacket cost three times as much. I didn't know about the shedding until the first time I wore the jacket and found seal hair all over the car.

The good news is that shedding is usually a sign of approaching warm weather, so soon I won't need a jacket at all. And the lady at the consignment shop where I bought the coat reimbursed me half of what I paid for it after I called her to tell her that I was leaving a hair trail behind me, so I guess having a shedding, not very warm but still oh so cute fur coat for $24 after the refund is not such a bad deal.

Back to the story. SH and I went to this divey little Turkish place for schwarmas. We had planned to go to this African restaurant to use a coupon we got on last year, but when we walked into the African place, it stank of cigarette smoke and Pine-sol. Now, I don't have a problem with either of those smells on their own -- I love the smell of fresh cigarette smoke and I love the smell of Pine-Sol because it reminds me of the cleaning ladies (Soli and Rosario) we had in Spain when I was a little girl and their wonderful cooking and Spanish-lady sweaters and smells and because spreading a little Pine-Sol around the bathroom before company comes is a great way to fake a clean house, but I don't care for stale cigarette smell and I certainly don't care for the two smells mixed together.

I knew as soon as we walked into the place that I didn’t want to eat there, but we’d spent three dollars on the coupon and I hate to waste the money. But when the guy behind the bar told us that he had told the people a year ago that he didn’t want to sell any more coupons but that (deep sigh accompanied by eye-rolling) he would honor it if he had to, that cinched it. We left.

We went to the Turkish place. It’s little with a front door that doesn’t latch. I was sitting right in the path of the cold air from the door, although pretty much the entire place was in the path. There were two people sitting next to the door and a guy standing next to it waiting for a takeout order. We were sitting by the counter. Every time the door opened (at least ten times while we were eating), the opener wouldn’t push it closed. I would get up and close it all the way.

So here’s my hothouse flower question:

After seeing me, still clad in my shedding fur coat because I am so cold, which is not making it easy to eat because remember this coat is stiff, not supple, get up to close the door over and over and over, do you think it might occur to the people either sitting or standing next to the door to shut it once in a while? Or how about this – if the people who came in saw me shut it, should they have been more careful to close it behind them as they left?

Or am I just a cold-blooded southern expat who better get used to this climate or else you know what and they don’t have any sympathy for my pathetic self?


AndiMAC said...

Oh hell to the no. I would have complained or SOMETHING! Thanks for the tip on fur.

Anonymous said...

You NEED a mink!!! I live in N. Florida & have's a necessity in 'Wiscongo'....White-Chocolate

John0 Juanderlust said...

Obliviots have taken over. Possibly the majority of people have become possessed by obliviot demons. I'm not sure but since you have the inside line, why not bring a little spritzer of Holy Water along next time. Seen who it burns.

Richard in NY said...

I think that in Milwaukee they were probably upset that you kept cutting off the ventilation by closing the door. Does cold air have civil rights to go where it pleases? Maybe that was it.