Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Marriage 101, Lecture 574: Rituals

It is important for a couple to have rituals. Rituals allow us to carve out space and time that is special, separate from ordinary time. They connect us to the past and to each other.

SH and I have many rituals. One is that he asks me why I do something, even though I have no answer. Another is that he straightens the knife rack. He also keeps the toothpaste squeezed properly.

Then there is the ritual where he cuts coupons for products we do not really need and sticks them on the refrigerator, where they stay until I go through them and throw out all the expired ones.


Lindy said...

I laughed when I saw the picture. I have the same Buca's coupon on my refrigerator, which I replace every time a new one is issued. I've yet to eat there!

Anonymous said...

Did somebody say "Deal"?

Laura(southernxyl) said...

Questions without answers. I love those.

R has finally stopped asking me what I am looking for. If I am looking for, say, my purse, I am not looking for "my purse". I am looking for, it's like that, and like that, and has a, and it's red with a, and it has - in it. In other words, my right brain is trying to match *that* with the things I am seeing, and for me to answer the question, it has to toss *that* over to the left brain, which then has to come up with the words "my purse". So the correct answer to "what are you looking for" is "I don't know" even though that is manifestly not true; or if true, indicates that I have finally lost my mind, which I may have.

I don't know if you have been married long enough for all of this. You may have to continue to get questions with no answers for a while. Pay your dues.

class-factotum said...

Lindy, we actually have eaten at Buca's and now they won't leave us alone. But there are a gajillion other restaurants on the list, so we probably won't get back there any time soon.

Gary, would you just register already?

Laura, I try to do stuff when SH is not around so I don't have to answer the questions.