Friday, November 06, 2009

Marriage 201, Lecture 431: Sauce for the goose

SH: A waterproof mp3 player? Why do you need a waterproof mp3 player*?

Me: Because my knee and my shoulder are really bothering me and I need to switch to swimming for a while [from step aerobics and weight training], but swimming is so boring that an mp3 player would be nice.

My sister and me, getting ready for a tough workout.

SH: Do you know how many mp3 players we already have in this house?

Me: No.

SH: Three.** And don't bring up the two Passports! That's different. The first one is eight years older than the new one.

Me: So the old one doesn't work any more?

SH: No. It works.

Me: Then what does the new one have that the old one doesn't?

SH: The new one has GPS [and other cool stuff].

Me: We don't use GPS.

SH: Not that kind. It knows where all the speed traps are [and other cool stuff].

Me: But shouldn't you slow down for speed traps anyhow?

SH: No. It knows what is garage door radar and [blah blah blah $500 worth of radar detector two years of birthday and Christmas present engineer car guy stuff].

* I would use the birthday money from my mom, so there.

** One was my Christmas gift from my mom a few years ago and I use it EVERY DAY to listen to the local radio talk shows instead of that awful music they play during aerobics at the gym. The other two I don't have anything to do with. I think SH got them at some engineer trade show as giveaways. They are never used. They could go in the Goodwill box. But I'll take those extra mp3 players out of SH's cold, dead hands.


Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness! The bathing suit your sister is wearing? My little sister had that one, too! Those are watermelon cutouts on the side, right? Too funny! Here's hoping you get that waterproof MP3 player - but I'm so out of the loop I didn't even know they had MP3 players for swimming!

Jan said...


A waterproof MP3 player for swimming makes perfect sense to me.

(That sound you just heard was Beloved hiding my credit cards.)

HRD said...

Now can someone explain this to me. I don't swim, butI do run and hill walk. I never wear an MP3 player, I like to be alone with my thoughts. Listening to music would just feel wrong. What is the attraction?

Lindy said...

My brother gave me one of the first waterproof headsets in the early 80's. It was like a rubber headband. I finally stopped wearing it because it was a novelty and too many people asked about it.

Swimming to music is very peaceful and helps establish a rhythm for laps.

class-factotum said...

Jane, I just found out about the waterproof players. I wish they'd had them 8 years ago when I swam for an hour every morning before work. Dull, dull, dull.

Jan, don't you have a secret hiding place of your own?

HRD, I sometimes run but mostly walk. I don't like to be alone with my thoughts. When SH and watch movies, I grab a magazine when he pauses the flick to go upstairs for ice cream (aka frozen custard). But I don't listen to music. I download the previous day's local radio talk shows so I can stay current with local and state politics. Music bores me, although Lindy is correct, it would help establish rhythm.