SH: A waterproof mp3 player? Why do you need a waterproof mp3 player*?
Me: Because my knee and my shoulder are really bothering me and I need to switch to swimming for a while [from step aerobics and weight training], but swimming is so boring that an mp3 player would be nice.
My sister and me, getting ready for a tough workout.
SH: Do you know how many mp3 players we already have in this house?
SH: Three.** And don't bring up the two Passports! That's different. The first one is eight years older than the new one.
Me: So the old one doesn't work any more?
SH: No. It works.
Me: Then what does the new one have that the old one doesn't?
SH: The new one has GPS [and other cool stuff].
Me: We don't use GPS.
SH: Not that kind. It knows where all the speed traps are [and other cool stuff].
Me: But shouldn't you slow down for speed traps anyhow?
SH: No. It knows what is garage door radar and [blah blah blah $500 worth of radar detector two years of birthday and Christmas present engineer car guy stuff].
* I would use the birthday money from my mom, so there.
** One was my Christmas gift from my mom a few years ago and I use it EVERY DAY to listen to the local radio talk shows instead of that awful music they play during aerobics at the gym. The other two I don't have anything to do with. I think SH got them at some engineer trade show as giveaways. They are never used. They could go in the Goodwill box. But I'll take those extra mp3 players out of SH's cold, dead hands.