After my sister tells me that she bought a raincoat* FOR HER DOG.
SH: Well, we're cat obsessed.
Me: No, you're cat obsessed.
SH: So are you.
Me: I never baby talk to the cats.
SH: Even when I'm not around?
Me: Never. NEVER.
SH: So you will probably never refer to yourself as "Mommy" to the cats, either.
Me: If I do, shoot me.
* In her defense, slight as it is, it was a nine dollar Old Navy raincoat. But come on. Clothes? For a PET?