Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Marriage 201, Lecture 319: She won't do it right

SH and I were away this long weekend at a secret location that I cannot discuss. I even had to delete all my facebook postings about the situation because -- well, just because. I can't talk about it until I write my book in a few years and then you will all know. Watch for me on Oprah and that's all I can say.


SH: But Regina* wasn't going to change the cat litter, was she?

Me: No. I changed it right before we left.

SH: Good.

Me: Why?

SH: What if she didn't do it right?

Me: How can you not change litter right?

SH: What if she changed it too soon? She would waste it!

Me: First of all, we get the stuff from Walmart that costs two dollars. Second, coming from the man who uses tinfoil to line pans [over my objections] just so he doesn't have to wash them [I am the one who washes them, so it is really over my objections], you don't have a lot of credibility on the waste issue.

SH: Well, she could use too much or not enough litter.

Me: Oh for pete's sake. She's had cats. It's not exactly rocket science.


* Regina is our super-sweet next-door neighbor who told us she would have been insulted if we hadn't asked her to feed the cats while we were gone.

** She had to clean up cat vomit not once but three times while we were gone. We've had to do it twice in the ten months we've had the cats. For that alone, she deserves a medal. Yes, we thought changing their food four days before we went out of town was a good idea. Why do you ask?

*** SH is watching me write this. "What if Regina reads this?"

Me: So what? She probably will. And if she doesn't, I'll tell her the story because it's funny. This is not a character assassination of her, it's a funny story about you.

1 comment:

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

He is too funny.
Thank goodness for neighbors who watch our pets, huh?
And secret location?? Deleted Facebook posts??? You are killing us here! Now you have to get your book published before Oprah goes off the air!