Monday, January 25, 2010

Marriage 201, Lecture 313: Stick a fork in it

Sunday evening. I'm reading a book* while SH is grilling our supper. Yes. He grills in the snow. Even though the snow she is going away. It has been raining - the tears of the Viking fans. Ha! To quote our friend Andrea, "Karma's a bitch, Brett!" Hahahahaha. The snow is washing away and is that grass we see in January?

I hear a voice calling to me from the kitchen.

Harrod's food hall in London from our trip last fall.

SH: It's ready!

I put down my book, turn off the light, gather the cats, throw them into the basement where we will eat supper while we watch a movie, and wait for SH to cut the meat. I have already prepared the salads and the plates. Everything is ready to go. But the meat.

He does not cut the meat.

He does not cut the meat.

He does not cut the meat.

Me: I thought you said it was ready.

SH: Yes.

Me: Why aren't you cutting the meat?

SH: Because it has to rest for ten minutes.

Me: Then why did you say it was ready?

SH: That's what "ready" means to you?

Me: That's what "ready" means to everybody!

SH: No! "Ready" just means that the meat is cooked.

Me: No. It means that it is TIME TO EAT.

* The Devil in the Junior League, total brain candy, but it's fun. I am a Junior League dropout, so I am particularly interested. This is old-school Junior League, not the Memphis Junior League, which my former landlady/real estate fairy godmother made me join as a way to make friends and meet men.

When I whined that the League consisted of women, she snapped that women have brothers and to just do what she said. I trusted her. Made some nice friends (Hi Aimee!) but never met any men. I did, however, discover the Junior League Thrift Shop omigosh $1,000 Michael Kors silk suits for $12, y'all.

And Mary Linda did find my wonderful little Memphis house the day it went on the market and made sure I got it by telling me to pay what the seller was asking and she was right. Another buyer bid $15,000 under the asking price, which ticked off the seller. (The seller's daughter lived next door and told me the story.) I made money when I sold it eight years later.


Bonnie said...

LOL!! Next time, just tell him there are two courses, salad & entree and you are starting now. ;-)

Gary just tells me when the meat is off the bbq & since it now has to rest 15 minutes, he lets me know I can start sautéing the veggies..... Aren't we lucky the guys enjoy doing this?

Sayya26 said...

Hilarious! Yes- i agree- ready means it's ready to eat....

Melissa said...

Meat has to "rest" for 10 minutes? Why -- was it exercising on the grill? I'm feeling a bit uncouth now.

Of course, with two young ones, it usually takes us that long to get them ready to eat after: getting them to leave whatever beloved toy they were playing with, use the facilities, wash hands, get them seated at the table, slap a bib on the young, messy one, and get beverage requests filled.

Jan said...

I'm sorry, I can't get past the fact that your dinner in that picture has FEET. I SO would not have been able to eat that - I have trouble shucking shrimp and crawfish.

TheHRD said...

I'd like to do the male alliance thing here, but ready.....means on the table.

Class factotum said...

Bonnie, yes we are lucky!

Sayya and HRD, thanks for your support.

Melissa, letting the meat rest gives the juices time to be reabsorbed back into the meat so they don't run out when you cut the meat. Who knew?

Jan, that's not our supper. It is bizarre, isn't it? But what about the bacon? Doesn't the bacon look great?

Melissa said...

@CF Wow, I'm definitely not a foodie. I had no idea. Though I kind of like it when the juices run out -- don't know why.