SH: I took that mileage charge off my expense report.
Me: Which charge?
SH: You put mileage from a previous trip on another report.
Me: Yes, but I explained it in the notes.
SH: But the dates didn't match.
Me: That's why I explained it in the notes. I had forgotten to expense the mileage on an old report. I just put it in this one instead.
SH: I didn't want to trigger an audit.
Me: But I didn't do anything wrong. It was a legitimate expense.
SH: It was just $16 out of over $3,000 I filed.
Me: It was still $16! That's enough for a pedicure at the beauty school!
SH: What if they audited?
Me: What if they did?
SH: It would just be trouble. And it's not that much money.
Me: This from the guy who makes sure I know when milk is on sale for $2 so I can save forty nine cents. Sheesh.