Friday, February 12, 2010

Marriage 201, Lecture 335: Take a message

The scene. Kitchen, 8:30 a.m. SH worked until 6 a.m. That's what those engineer guys are like when they find a problem and want to fix it. The phone rings. It's his phone. He has his phone, I have mine. We do not answer each other's phones. Never. Nobody calls me on his phone, nobody calls him on mine. That's how it should be, anyhow.

But I don't want to let the phone ring and wake him because he didn't come to bed until 6:00 a.m., ten minutes after I threw the cats in the basement.*

Marrakesh. BTW, I am reposting about my first trip to Morocco on the archive blog.

So I grab the phone and run into the basement. As soon as I open the basement door, Laverne tries to sneak into the kitchen, which would be fine, except her next stop is the bedroom door, where she will cry and cry and cry because she is sooooooo lonely, it having been two and a half hours since she has had human contact. So I grab her as I walk down the steps, saying hello into the phone.

The caller is confused: "I thought this was a business number. I must have misdialed."

I correct him. "No, this is SH's number, but he worked until 6 a.m. Can you call back?"

Yeah. I know. Wrong thing to say. And this after I have just finished watching season one of Mad Men. You'd think I'd know how to cover for the boss. I should have said, "This is SH's line, but he's not available. May I take a message?" But I had a squirming, crying cat in one arm and I was trying not to make too much noise and I just wasn't thinking. For dumb.

When SH wakes up, I tell him about the call. He's mad.

SH: Why did you answer the phone?

Me: I didn't want it to wake you.

SH: If I stay up that late, I should have to suffer the consequences of my decision.** What did you tell him?

I recount the conversation. SH groans.

SH: Oh no. Why didn't you at least act like a receptionist?

Me: Well, I think Laverne whining in the background might have tipped him off that you work from home and that this wasn't an actual office.

* Boy were they surprised when I went straight to DEFCON 1 and turned on the overhead light. Laverne froze, paws splayed out, looking at me accusingly, saying, "But you're cheating! You're not using a proportional response! You never turn on the light! You're supposed to hunt for us in the dark!"

"Ha!" I said. "New rules, girls! There's a new sheriff in town."

Shirley thought I couldn't see her if she just stayed under the dresser and that I wouldn't tug on her tail to get her out. Wrong again, missy.

** May I point out that SH does not usually have that attitude?


Jan said...

I NEVER answer Beloved's phone. I don't care if the caller ID said "President Obama" or "Angelina Jolie" I would not answer his phone.

I just don't want that kind of responsibility.

Queen of Cashmere said...

I would have picked up the phone and probably done the same thing. Next time, SH will turn of the ringer before turning in.
Loved your comment on Privilege. Your story made my heart do a pitter-pat. Gem of a guy.
BTW, man/boy is at school in Delafield. Will be slogging through the WI winter for a hug.