Me: Why can't I wear your Rice sweatshirt?
SH: It's mine! Get your own!
Churros y chocolate, another excellent way to keep warm.
Me: But the ones in the bookstore are crummy. Rice has lousy sweatshirts. That's the only good one I've ever seen.
SH: I don't wear your clothes.
Me: You can wear my clothes. I don't care.
SH [rolls eyes]: I don't want to wear your clothes. Besides, this is my good sweatshirt.
Me: You're wearing it to a divey, smokey bar where it's going to get filthy.
SH: I wear it so my bar friends can see it.
Me: Oh yeah. Like they've heard of Rice.
SH: They have.
Me: From anyone but you? Nobody outside of Texas has ever heard of Rice.
SH: I don't know.
Me: So you'll wear it out to a bar where it gets dirty but I, who actually went to that school, cannot wear it at home to keep warm.
SH: I don't want it to get worn out! I can't replace it!
Me: I can't believe you're so selfish with your sweatshirt!
SH: Fine. You can wear it, but only if you wear it outside the house. I don't want it to get worn out.
Me: So I can wear it to the gym or to the grocery store, where it will get dirty, but not in the house where I would use it to keep warm?