Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Marriage 201, Lecture 594: Basement eater

What my first email to SimpleHuman, whence my engagement trash can, said:

I can't close my trash can. It closes when the plastic bin is removed, but not when the bin is inside. I tried taking the trash bag out, but that makes no difference.

What my second email said:

Forget what I just wrote. I discovered my husband had jammed his Dill Pickle Pringles can (from the supply he hides from himself in the basement, although I am one to talk because that's where I keep my Cap'n Crunch, the cereal my mother just wouldn't buy when I was a kid) in sideways, which distorted the plastic bin. I didn't see the Pringles can because he had covered it with crumbled paper towels. When I asked him why he didn't just put the can in vertically, he claimed that he didn't want to waste trash space. Considering this man uses paper towels with impunity even though I leave cloth rags under the sink where they are easy to get and considering that one trash bag costs about two cents, if that much, which is one-gajillioneth of a beer unit, his story is suspicious. I think he just didn't want me to know he had finished yet another can of chips.

4 comments:

Heather said...

Them Pringles are soo easy to go through the whole can! Haha

Heather Griffith Brewer said...

Please tell me you got a really awesome reply.

Class factotum said...

Heather 2 - Nope. Not a word. Can you believe it?

Anonymous said...

We're glad that it was sorted out!

At simplehuman, we stand 100% behind our products and hope that we can continue to serve you in the years to come.

Sincerely,
Lisa Chen
Director, eCommerce & Customer Service