Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Marriage 301, Lecture 493: Anatomy of a crime part 3


You can read part 1 of this story here and part 2 here.

I took SH to the airport. When I got home, the Van Guy was back. SH and I were going to be out of town for ten days, so I wanted VG to have my phone number and email to let us know what the mechanic said. I wrote them down, then walked across the street and had one of the workers summon him.

He came outside. "Hey, I'm sorry if I got you into trouble with your husband," he said. "I went over there to tell you about the wheel. I didn't see the car but thought you might be there."

"No, it's fine," I said. "He's just upset that he had to hear it from someone else instead of from me."

I explained that we would be gone and handed him the information.

"I took the van to my mechanic at lunch," he said. "He wants to replace the whole thing, but I told him that it didn't have to look perfect, it just had to work. So I'm going to take it to the body shop later and see what they have to say."

"I am so sorry," I groaned. "You're having to go through all this trouble and it's all my fault."

"Don't worry about it," he assured me. "It was an accident."

"You're being so nice about it!" I told him.

"I'm pretty sure you didn't wake up this morning and think, 'I'd like to hit someone's van today,'" he shrugged.

"Actually, I thought that would be the perfect start to a busy week!" I said. "Really, though, I came over here before to ask what kind of brownies you and your crew wanted."

"You're going to make brownies?"

"I was going to make them to thank you for fixing it yourself, but now I guess I am just going to make them. They're not a bribe, though." [Yes they are.]

"We're leaving in 15 minutes."

"That's not enough time. Are you here tomorrow?"

"Just for a little while. We're done with this job."

I told him I would make them and leave them on the porch for him. He looked at the paper I had given him.

"This is your cell?" he asked.

"Yes. Just give me a call when you have the estimate."

He paused. "Maybe we could go out to lunch and talk about it once it's ready."

What?! What on earth does lunch have to do with this?

I swallowed and said, "Well sure maybe." I haven't been asked on a date in over five years, so I don't know if this is one or what and I certainly didn't have a turn-down answer ready.

I reached my hand out to shake his. "It's been nice to meet you." I paused and thought about it. "Well, no, I guess I can't say that because I only met you because I hit your van. But you have been very nice about it."

"Maybe it happened for a reason," he said. "You never know about these things."

"Um-hmm!" I said as I nodded. Maybe it happened because I was careless and hey, who needs our $500 for the deductible anyhow?

"Years from now, you could need someone to do some remodeling and you might think of me."

"Oh definitely," I assured him.

Then I asked SH if he thought I had been hit on. Oh yes, he said. OK then, I told him. If I am going to have an affair with a carpenter, you need to figure out what house projects you want done. We might as well take advantage.

4 comments:

Swami Dil said...

Hahaha! This gets better every day! Talking of remodelling, call if you need an Architect too!

yellowsnapper said...

That is beyond awesome. Well, awesome in a creeper way. But yeah, too funny.

John0 Juanderlust said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kikita said...

I love you.
You make me laugh out loud.


So.... what are the odds that I can get some of these bribery brownies? ;-)