Monday, July 04, 2011

Marriage 301, Lecture 260: One man's lazy is another woman's When Are You Going To Do The Chores?

SH: You're nagging me about being lazy!

Me: No I'm not. You brought it up when you said you were being lazy. All I did was ask when the Lazy Time is going to end.

SH: Don't nag.

Me: OK. I won't. Especially because you promised that you would do the things [on the chore list] that we agreed on before your sabbatical is over.

SH: I haven't agreed to them yet.

Me: I know. But you promised that once you agreed, you would do them. Is there anything on that list you find morally objectionable?

SH: I don't think "throw out crap in the basement" is specific enough. If you want me to throw away everything that will ever be thrown away, it probably won't happen this summer.*

Me: [Rats.]

SH: But I also don't suppose I can get away with just throwing away one box,** either.

Me: I would prefer not.

* I have to admit SH is not as hoarder-ish as some other people he knows and for whom he spent ten days cleaning out their house. He is not as hoarder-ish as the neighbor who died intestate without heirs last September and whose house is still jam packed with crap, including bars and bars of new soap in the dressers.

** The box of receipts for his stepdaughter's college tuition? In case someone else in her life wants to help pay for the degree she got 12 years ago? The 1997 phone bills? The silly hats? The tapered leg jeans that SH says might come back into style again (sadly, he is probably right) and that he says look good on him (no, he is wrong about this - nobody looks good in tapered leg jeans).

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