Saturday, August 27, 2011
Chats du jour: What do we do with the body?
I am facing a problem that many of you probably face in the summer:
What do you do with the corpse of the chipmunk your cat has just killed?
More specifically, what do you do with the corpse of the chipmunk your cat has just killed when it is Thursday and trash day is not until the next Wednesday?
I have already discovered that a chipmunk killed on Monday morning and tossed into the trash will lead to blue bottle flies swarming furiously above the trash can by Tuesday evening. When my husband is grilling the Belgian endive and the trout.
That was last night. Tuesday was whitefish. Pan fried with butter. Served with Lidia's green beans with anchovies, garlic and lime.
Point is that it doesn't take too long for those flies to find a corpse, especially when it's 95 degrees outside. (Which is another thing: if you have to shovel yourself out of your house in the winter, you should not have to be hot in the summer. Just saying.)
So what do you do with the chipmunk? Is the solution to keep Laverne hungry so she'll eat her kills rather than just parading them around the new $5,000 driveway that we got instead of a fancy vacation?
No. That would just mean having to discard the remains of the corpse instead of the entire corpse.
Discarding an entire corpse is not so hard - you just lift it up with gardening tools and toss it in the trash. If it were a gnawed corpse, that might be harder.
What we do with fish remains in the summer (See: Grilled trout) is keep them in a plastic bag in the fridge until trash day, then toss them.
Do I want a chipmunk corpse next to the pear tart, the cubed cantaloupe, and the pesto?