Friday, January 27, 2012

Marriage 401, Lecture 398: Cookie conundrum


This happened two days after we ordered three boxes of Girl Scout cookies, which is highly unusual for us. We usually don't buy cookies of any sort except for the expensive Toledo cookies and look how that turned out. The only reason we bought these was because my friend at book club was telling us that she had taken her daughter door to door selling but the girls in the troop whose parents sell cookies at work for them sell way more than her daughter. My motto is if you ring my doorbell and ask me to buy your cookies, I will do it. It is a safe motto to have, as it seems that most Girl Scouts sell via their parents now.

My other motto is that I will be very annoyed - very - if I am forced to buy your child's products simply because you are my boss. Are you listening, Jim C? Bringing your kid's band candy bars to work and then asking me if I want to buy one is not fair. Am I supposed to say no to the person who controls whether I have a job or not? People. Don't ask your subordinates to buy your kid's candy bars or cookies or wrapping paper. Don't ask your co-workers. Or, at least, don't ask your childless co-workers. You parents can buy from each other - I bought yours so you have to buy mine - but leave those of us without children out of it. All we get is overpriced wrapping paper. No selling at work! That's what I'm saying.

So Julie brought her little girl to our house and SH and I pored over the cookie list and ordered three boxes, which is three more boxes of cookies than we really need in our house, especially when you consider that we still have a roll of HobNobs in the freezer from our last trip to England, which was in 2009, I think. Or 2007. I can't remember.*

And yet, SH complains.

SH: You know what don't have enough of around here?

Me: What?

SH: Cookies.

Me: Nope.

SH: Are you agreeing with me?

Me: Yep.

SH: Not enough cookies.

Me: Except there are those chocolate buckwheat and the cornmeal lemon cookies in the freezer.

SH: Not those. They're frozen.**

Me: What about the pizelle in the cupboard?

SH: Those are for with custard.

Me: So?

SH: The problem with cookies in this house is they take too much planning.




* First world problem or old age? You decide.

** And just how long does it take to thaw a cookie, really? Not very. I know, as I have eaten a cookie I have extracted from the freezer even before I have made it back up the stairs before.

*** Hiding cookies from myself in the freezer isn't necessarily the best strategy, although sometimes I forget they're there. Sometimes, I forget the Fritos are in the freezer, too, but when I remember, I want some RIGHT AWAY. NOW. Oh wouldn't they be good with the ranch dressing I made yesterday? Yes, they would. Or with the leftover Ro-Tel tomato dip from book club last week. Only half the group showed up, which was fine because that meant lots of leftover Ro-Tel dip and Memphis Junior League onion dip.

2 comments:

Gaylin said...

I remember from way back in the pre-allergy days that frozen oreos are really, really good!

Class factotum said...

Gaylin, frozen ginger bacon cookies are also excellent!

PS I didn't know one could be allergic to oreos.