Monday, February 20, 2012
Marriage 401, Lecture 124: Cross dressing
SH: Wow. These are tight for a medium.
Me: That's because it's a women's medium.
Me: The running tights. That you're trying on. They're women's.
SH: Why did you get me women's clothes?
Me: Because the only thing I found last time in the men's was long underwear! And we didn't figure out that they didn't work* until after you had worn them and they couldn't be returned. I got a large, too. Try it.
SH: I can't wear women's clothes!
Me: Oh sure you can!
SH: No. I'm not trying them. Take these. I'm not wearing women's clothes.
Me: There is not one single characteristic of these tights that identifies them as women's. If I hadn't told you, you wouldn't know.
SH: But they're women's clothes! It's OK for women to wear men's clothes, but it's not OK for men to wear women's clothes.
Me: If you are running and get hit by a car, I can promise that there is not one single way that the ambulance people will be able to tell that you're wearing women's tights.
* The waist didn't stay up while SH was running, so he looked like a middle-aged hip-hopper running along, clutching the top of his pants so they would stay on, just like those kids have to hold up their jeans as they shuffle across the street. I look at those kids and think, "If there's a fire at school, kid, you're not going to make it out."