Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Marriage 401, Lecture 269: What is love?
A few days ago on facebook, a friend noted that her husband had done something very romantic for her. She asked us what our husbands did like that. (Not in a snarky, "look what MY husband did, you losers!" way but in a "Hey isn't this cool and let's share our experiences" way.)
I had no tales of flowers or perfume (which I don't wear) or jewelry (which I hardly ever wear). I had no tales of surprise trips to another city to see my favorite band or of a romantic weekend away at a little B&B.
But was I whiney? Was I depressed when I read what the other women posted about their romantic husbands? Did I despair that I had married the most unromantic, meanest man in the world Who Didn't Care? Did I think, "I could have stayed single and gotten this much romance, plus I wouldn't be doing laundry for another person?"
I did not.
Because I remembered what SH did a few weeks ago when the city dropped off our new trash can.
We put the old trash can out at the curb for emptying. It wasn't due to be collected for another week.
After trash day, we pulled the can back by the garage to wait until the can pickup. The city had asked that the trash cans be empty. We took a look inside the old trash can.
The newspaper bags full of cat poop were still stuck to the bottom of the trash can.
Why I do not know. The bags were sealed. It must just have been that there was enough sticky stuff on the bottom of the trash can to hold the small plastic bags. The magic of physics or chemistry or whatever science covers how one kind of bag can stick but not the big Glad bag that weighs a lot more. This is materials science or it's just logic.
Anyhow. Is it reasonable to expect the people who are taking care of the old trash cans to clean the cat poop bags out?
It is not.
That is above and beyond the call of duty for anyone. You clean up your own (or your pet's) poop. You don't leave it for someone else. Which is why I get so annoyed when I see dog leavings on the street or the grass. What kind of jerky dog owner doesn't clean up after his pet?
I had neighbors in Memphis who had three dogs. The dogs used the back yard as their toilet, which is usually how it works with dogs. Which is fine. Except the neighbors did not police the area. Which meant I could smell it.
People. Dog poop + summer = Your neighbors will hate you. Even if you don't mind the smell, please think about the rest of us.
Back to my story.
We couldn't leave the cat bags in the can for someone else to clean out in a hot week or two later. That would be just too mean.
But we didn't want to deal with it at that moment. Without speaking, we looked at each other, let the lid close, and walked back into the house. I resigned myself to cleaning the can out in a day or two, before putting it back on the street for collection.
The day before the can was to be put out, I put on my big-girl pants and went outside to do the deed.
But when I opened the trash can, it was empty.
I looked in the new trash can.
There is was. The cat poop had magically migrated from the old can to the new can.
I went inside and found the poop fairy. "Did you move the poop?" I asked SH.
"Of course," he said.
"You didn't leave it for me?"
"No!" He was horrified. "I wouldn't make you do something like that! I moved it." Then he went back to work.
And that, my friends, is why I don't care that I don't get flowers or perfume or fancy dinners. Because I don't have to move the poop.