Saturday, August 11, 2012

Marriage 401, Lecture 634: No time for love


After SH comes home at 8:45 from a meeting.

SH: So are we going to [wxyz]?

Me: I doubt it.

SH: Why?

Me: Because it would not be how you roll for you to come home after being gone all evening and go straight to a focused activity.

SH: I could.

Me: Ha. No. First, you'll go upstairs to check your email and facebook and that will take 20 minutes. Then you'll say you're starving. It will take you 15 minutes to assemble your supper just right* and then choose the proper wine. Then it will take you 20 interminable minutes to eat because you are the slowest eater in the world. Then you'll tell me that you have one more quick thing to do upstairs but it will take you 20 minutes and when I start yelling at you to get your butt down here, you'll tell me not to be cranky. By then, it will be well past 10. I get up at 6. So no. It's not going to happen.

SH: It's because you don't care.

* Vegetables reheated in the microwave, but meat gets warmed in the toaster oven.

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