Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Marriage 401, Lecture 684: Freakout du chats
On Sunday, we put the flea stuff on the cats.
Usually, we use Frontline. But we were at Costco last year and they had their own brand of flea stuff for cats and it was a lot cheaper than Frontline.
So we bought it. Why not? SH has bought Kirkland products in the past and they have not been a problem. We don't buy so many any more since we started our "Not Made in China" ban, but their coffee is fine. Butter is fine. SH gets all his Eye of Newt at Costco. Our doctor told him what I've been telling him, which is all those supplements just give you expensive urine, but our advice falls on deaf ears.
Why would the cat flea stuff be any problem?
We put it on the cats. The first thing we noticed was that there was a lot of it - the backs of the cats' necks were soaking wet. We separated the cats so they wouldn't lick the wet product off each other and tralalalala, we were done.
When I got home from work on Monday, I noticed the cats' hair was still spiky and oily where the solution had been. "They've been trying to lick it off all day," SH said. "There were clumps of hair all over the place. I'm afraid they're going to lick themselves raw."
It looked bad. To the interweb I went.
It chilled my blood.
Cats have died from this product.
I jumped up. "We have to wash it off them!" I said.
"Wait!" SH said.
"No! Now!" I grabbed a washcloth from the bathroom and came back to the kitchen.
"You're not going to use a regular washcloth on them, are you? Aren't there any rags?"
I glared at him. "The washcloth can be washed, you know. We have to do this now."
I wet the washcloth with warm water, squirted a bunch of Dawn on it - "Dawn? You're using Dawn?" SH asked.
"Yes! It cuts grease!"
- grabbed Shirley, and started rubbing at the greasy spot. She held still - maybe she just thought she was being groomed - while I got her fur good and soapy. Then I moved her to the sink, put her under the tap, and turned on the water.
"Wait!" SH shouted. "You're going to get water all over the place!"
"I can clean it up!" I shouted back. Shirley started to squirm and fight. I had to let her go. I grabbed the dish towel to dry her off. "That's the DISH TOWEL!" SH said.
"I KNOW!" I said.
I was so busy taking care of the problem that I hadn't even explained to him. "Cats have DIED from this!" I said. "We have to get it off them NOW!"
I repeated the process with Laverne, who howled mournfully as I ran the water over her neck but let me do it. She submits to almost anything.
"Wait! What do you mean cats have died?"
"I mean cats have died from this product. They've gotten really sick!"
SH was stunned. "But I've never had anything bad from Costco!"
I shrugged. "Who knew?"
"But I thought it was a good product!" he said frantically as the blood drained from his face. "I never would have bought it if I'd known it was going to hurt our cats."
"I know," I answered. "Why would you even think that? But we got it off them and they seem to be fine. The cats who got sick got sick right away, but I didn't want to take any chances."
He shook his head.
"You're a freak outer about washing the cats," I told him.
"You just jump into things! You don't plan!"
"It needed to be done!" I answered.
"But if I were going to do it, I would have made a plan. I would have gotten all the materials in place and thought about how to do it."
"Yeah, well, we didn't have until Saturday to get this done," I told him.
He laughed. "Nope. So I'm a freak outer."
"Yes, you are. And I'm a get things doner."
On Tuesday morning, I emailed SH to ask how the cats were doing. He wrote back, "They are OK. Laverne seems back to normal, and Shirley is a bit lethargic but seems to be improving. It appears that they've stopped grooming each other constantly since you washed their necks. You did the right thing, but I still had to freak out!"