Saturday, March 02, 2013

Marriage 501, Lecture 674: The essence of beaniness


 SH: I did something today. We'll have to see if you like it.

Me: Oh no. What did you buy now?

[As in, how many toaster ovens do we need?]

SH: I didn't buy anything. But those black beans you made? I cooked them for another three hours.

Me: Why?

SH: Because I don't like beans that are so - so - so beany!

Me: What do you mean, "beany?"

SH: I like them cooked down and mushy, not recognizable as individual beans.

Me: Oh for pete's sake.

SH: Why didn't you cook them down to mush? Don't you know that's how I like them?

Me: I can't keep track of all your food rules.

SH: Haven't you noticed that I only like beans when we go to a Mexican restaurant and they are cooked down?

Me: Nope.

SH: How can you not notice?

Me: Like I said, it's too much to keep track of.

SH: Taste them. I think they're better.


Me: I can't taste any difference.

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