Friday, July 05, 2013

Wisconsin 101: Where being on time is late

I got home the other day and our neighbor, Keith, who had agreed to feed the cats while we were out of town, was waiting for me in the kitchen while SH shaved in the bathroom.

Let me recount the conversation I had with Keith:

Me: That's great that you can feed the cats! Our regular catfeeder has a volleyball tournament. I thought I was safe that he wasn't in band, but volleyball is turning out to be way worse.

Keith: No, that's fine. I don't mind. Maybe I should come over so you can show me where everything is?

Me: Sure. I get home at 5:30, so why don't you come over at quarter of six? That will give me time to change clothes and put my things away.

But - when I got home at 5:30, Keith was already there. SH was laughing, saying, "He said you said 5:30!"

I shook my head. "Nope. I said 5:45."

But no big deal. I showed Keith where the cat food is and explained that it is necessary to wait until Shirley is done eating to keep Laverne from pushing her away and taking her food. "No longer than two minutes, though," I said. "You don't have all night. If she's hungry, she can eat at her next meal."

When Keith left, SH and I had this conversation:

SH: You didn't tell me he was coming over!

Me: That's because he wasn't supposed to be here until I was home.

SH: He didn't hear the 5:45 part. He only heard 5:30. And then he still showed up early!

Me: That's how people in Wisconsin roll.

SH: You should have told me.

Me: Why? He wasn't supposed to come until I was home and so what that he was early?

SH: But what if I didn't know what to do?

Me: But you did know what to do.

SH: But what if your bus had been delayed and you weren't going to be home at 5:45? THEN WHAT?

Me: Then I would have called you and told you that Keith was coming over and to show him where the cat food is. Sheldon.

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