Monday, January 19, 2015

Wisconsin 101: What we do in the winter when it is below zero and we do not drink

You guys know I am lazy and that when I come home from work, I don't want to do anything other than vegetate, right? Some people have energy and want to be around people and are social and go out, but not me. The last thing I want to do is to be around more people after a day at work where I am around people.

I am even around really nice people at work. I am finally back in a good work situation. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop - my previous job still has me a bit traumatized - but perhaps there is no other shoe. Perhaps the previous job was a one-shoe job. Was an amputee.

Whatever. The old job is gone. And one of my nemises (is that the plural of nemisis?) has been fired! I feel vindicated! (Is there a better feeling than watching one's enemies be vanquished?)

But even though I like my job and work with great people, I still want nothing to do with more people when I get home from work. Even SH. Even though I love him.

SH is lonely all day at home by himself, so when I get home, he wants to chatter, but I do not want to talk. This is a conflict. I have resolved it by deciding that it is important for me that my husband be happy, so my expectations now are that my first 45 minutes home will be devoted to preparing my clothes and lunch for the next day while I tend to my marriage.

Usually, after 30 to 45 minutes, SH has had enough and returns to whatever it was he was doing. (Yesterday, it was cleaning the bathtub, which is the first time he has done that chore since we married. I have to say there are some advantages to having a spouse who does not have a money job, although really, I would rather have the money and clean the tub myself, but we go to war with the army we have.)

Once SH is busy again, then I do my thing, which is usually to cook or to read or to watch DVDs.

My latest show, thanks to a recommendation from our friend Jeff Abbott (whose books you need to read and I would say that even if he were not my friend) is The Blacklist.

You guys, you have to watch this show. First and really the only reason - James Spader.

James Spader. There. I said it again. He is the only reason you need. He is not as handsome as he was when he was younger, but he still has as much pull as he ever did. Looks do not last, but personality does.

James Spader is enough to make me overlook the eye-rolling dumb things the writers put in the show. Honestly, have none of the writers ever had a job? I mean, writing is a job and it would be really hard to write a TV show, week after week, but some of the things they say are things you would never say if you had worked at a regular job for a little while or had done anything like read a newspaper.

These are the three things that jumped out at me over the course of season 1. I think I am right about all of these, but if I am not, I will feel pretty darn dumb.

1. One episode was about a life insurance company that was cancelling life insurance policies because people had gotten sick. I worked for an insurance company for five years. As far as I know, the only reason we could ever cancel a policy was if someone didn't pay the premium. Otherwise, why would anyone bother to buy life insurance, knowing it could be cancelled if you got cancer?

2. Liz, who is an FBI agent, is thinking about taking maternity leave when she and Tom (spoiler alert: he turns out to be a bad guy) adopt their baby. Tom says, "But you could lose your job!"

Hello. There are maternity leave laws that apply to larger companies. I expect that the FBI is not exempt from federal law about maternity leave. There is no danger that Liz would lose her job for taking maternity leave.

3. Liz and her FBI fellows are always busting into houses and buildings looking for clues. No warrants. I don't think they are allowed to do that. I don't think law enforcement is allowed to just break into a house without a warrant. I base my knowledge on reading lots of crime novels and on a shallow study of the US Constitution.


Cleo from Jersey said...

I love your essays. They really capture your wit and writing style......and who doesn't like to see a bully/monster get his/her due.

webb said...

There is a slim possibility that the FBI is NOT covered by the maternity law - Congress has a disturbing history of exempting itself from the laws it passes for the rest of us. But, i think that you are correct on this one.

Class factotum said...

Thank you, Cleo! There is nothing better than seeing an enemy get her comeuppance, is there?

Webb, I hadn't thought of that. Congress does like to tell us what to do, don't they?