Speaking of waste of time rituals that consume precious minutes of life that we will never get back, how do you guys order beer or wine at a restaurant?
I do not order it at all because I don't like the way beer and wine taste and if I am going to consume recreational calories, I am going to consume them in the form of butter and/or cheese . Not even chocolate or Nutella - my sweet tooth has declined in the past years. But hot salty fat? Or even room temperature salty fat? I am there.
Occasionally, I might order a drink, like a chocolate martini, which almost always disappoints me: it tastes way too much of liquor and not enough of cream and chocolate. I drink half of it. Half is enough to make me a little buzzed. The other half goes to waste. I look at it and think, "There's four and a half dollars I will never get back."
The few times I have tried something other than a chocolate martini, I have been ever more disappointed. But what do you do when you don't like the way a nine or eleven-dollar drink tastes? It tastes the way it's supposed to. It's not the restaurant's fault I don't like it.
Wasted money. Wasted calories. Better to eat the bread and butter. Does butter ever disappoint? No it does not. There is no such thing as a Bad Butter Experience.
But when I do order something at a restaurant, I read the description on the menu. I may ask a question or two of the waiter and then I make a decision. A decision that does not require any drama or any research.
How hard is it to pick an item from a menu?
Hard, I guess. Hard if you are 1. SH and 2. ordering beer or wine.
How would you order beer or wine at a restaurant? Would you look at the menu, perhaps engage in some conversation - "What do you have on draft?" - and then make a decision?
That would make you a normal person.
But if you are SH, you have to spend - I am not making this up - the first ten minutes of any time at a restaurant on your phone looking up beer (and wine) ratings and reviews, talking to the bartender, sampling, and then reading more stuff.
While I sit there and twiddle my thumbs and think about getting my phone out so I can read the paper or Ask A Manager or whatever but it seems very rude to be sitting at a table with another person while you are on your ph--
Except when the other person is on his phone. If the other person is on his phone, then why not? Why not have two people at a table at a restaurant reading their phones instead of talking to each other? (Which is a whole different issue from "how hard is it to order a beer anyway?")
I do not remember "For waiting" in my wedding vows.