Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Marriage 701, Lecture 563: Thieves afoot on Madeline Island, or, Occam's Razor

We are on vacation. We are here. It is wonderful. We are making lunch. My uncle's bratwurst and grilled vegetables.

SH is doing all the cooking. All the cooking and all the dish doing and most of the work.

That is fine with me.

SH: Where's the silicone brush?

Me: I don't know. We brought it with us, right?

[Of course we brought it with us. I keep a spreadsheet of what we need to take on vacation and the silicone brush that we use to put olive oil on vegetables is on the spreadsheet.]

SH: I used it for the zucchini the other day.

Me: So you had it last.

SH: Yes.

Me: And now you can't find it.

SH [as he opens and closes every drawer in the kitchen.]: No!

Me: So you lost it.

SH: Yes.

Me: So you are not doing it right?

SH: Where is it? What happened?

Me: It will turn up.

SH: No! I can't find it! I think someone must have taken it!

Me: Who?

SH: Someone!

Me: You mean someone broke into this cottage just to steal a silicone brush?

SH: It is the only logical explanation!

Me: Or - you lost it and it will turn up.

SH [wearily]: It's gone. Someone took it.

Me: You're crazy.

SH: Oh.

Me: What?

SH: Um. Well. Guess what?

Me: What?

SH: I remember now. I had put it on top of this pitcher so I would be sure to see it and not leave it here and it looks like it fell behind it.

Me: So it wasn't stolen.

SH: I guess not.


Elizabeth near that red building said...

OMG. I endure this conversation with my 12.8 year old almost daily!

Judy said...

I had this conversation about a pair of shoes with my 9 year old this morning.

"I can't find {specific} shoes"
"They were on the shoe rack yesterday evening before we went to swimming lessons."
"Someone took them." (tears as only a 9 YO girl can)
"Did you put them in your room?" I look in her room. Nope.
"OK, I guess I'll wear {other} shoes"
I found them on the porch as I went to get the paper.


Tricia said...

I love that you have a vacation packing spreadsheet! My husband (the chef) takes everything but the proverbial sink when we rent a condo, but he merely has a list, not a spreadsheet. Must remedy soonest!

Class factotum said...

There are bad people! Who want our shoes! And things a 12.8 year old wants! And our cooking equipment!

Tricia, I learned the spreadsheet trick from my friend Leigh, who is a project manager. She started a spreadsheet for her annual party, keeping track of what kind of food got eaten (salty, not sweet), how many people showed up vs number invited, how much booze got consumed. Now I keep a spreadsheet for the cottage and take copious notes every year. Unfortunately, one of the notes I took this year was, "The Pie Garage closes at 3 on Sunday, not at 4." This year, we got no pie. :(