Sunday, April 03, 2016

The end of the line

Hi everyone,

I am closing this blog down. It has been a good run and it is time to stop. The truth? I am tired and I am lazy and there has been a ton of drama in our lives in the past year that I had not been able to write about here (SH's drunk father fell on his drunk mother, broke her knees, put her in the hospital, from which she emerged in a box, then SH's father died six weeks later from an infection after surgery, then SH's half brother decided he would replace the jerk void left by the death of SH's father, etc, etc, etc.).

Why couldn't I write about it here?

Because SH's parents used to have the address to this blog, which is where they read my wedding project plan that gave them their excuse to tell SH that he should not marry me and that they were going to boycott the wedding. I couldn't write anything here that they might see because although I could not care less what they thought about me, they used to make SH's life miserable.

But they are dead. SH has spent the past year dealing with all their crap. Here's some advice:

1. Throw out all the old useless junk in your house unless you hate your children and want them to have to deal with it. By "crap," I mean your check registers from the 70s, your eight year old bills, and your winter clothes (if you live in Florida).

2. If you have any porn, sex toys, or photos of you and your partner using such toys, please arrange for a friend to get rid of it before your child has to clean out your house.

3. If you are going to disinherit your son, then don't make him the executor of your will and the trustee for the trusts you want established and managed until your grandchildren are 30. (The youngest is 17.) It really is adding insult to injury to disinherit your kid - after you have threatened to do so many times if he does not get that wife of his "in line" - and then still expect him to do all the work.

4. If you are the older half sibling and your mentally-disabled son will inherit $150,000 from his grandparents, do not try to drain the trust for your own purposes, i.e,. remodeling your house, funding your IRA, and taking a family vacation to Europe. It will just confirm everyone's opinion of you as a complete jerk.

5. If you are the husband, please don't bring your parents' ashes into your home.

6. Marry a rich orphan. Seriously. I love SH and I have no idea how he is the wonderful man he is given his mean, drunk parents. But bad in-laws can make you miserable. 

I am tired. SH is tired. I have a great new job that I really like with a fabulous boss, but it requires actual thought and concentration and by the time I get home, I am done. I just don't feel like doing a lot of writing.

You guys have been great. I have enjoyed you so much. Thank you for reading.

Xxoxoxox,

Class Factotum


 I leave you with a photo of Shirley walking away from her binky after she has carried it upstairs, yowling desperately.

20 comments:

LPC said...

Well I'll miss it, no denying that. But, on beyond zebra as Dr. Seuss said!

Katja said...

*You've* been great. Thank you for your wit, your classy turns of phrase, and your humanity. Onward and upward!

Charlene said...

I'll miss you. You've added so many smiles to my days! Here's wishing you and SH lots of smiles and lots of laughter as you lighten your load a little. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

Yes, it has been a good run, and I shall miss your contributions as I have enjoyed them for probably a decade or so.

fin

babeck said...

Bravo to an amazing run of your blog...have really enjoyed your writing but have always wondered how you could handle all so graciously...I'd have been a basket case!! Hugs!!

Ohiofarmgirl said...

WAIT! don't leave yet. gosh, i've been missing you. the fb shut down my acct a while ago - again - and so i had to come up with a new one. and today - of all days - the last day of your blog.....your name popped into my head.... that's gotta mean something, right?
it turns out tho, that not only cant i remember anyone's name... i cant spell names either. but i remembered your cat's names but that did not help... anyway. i coudlnt find you on the fb and i'm hoping you will find and friend me here:
https://www.facebook.com/kai.nicholas.37
your pal who is trying not to sound desperate or weird,
Brunhilda G/OFG... momma to Kai and Zander and Nicholas and the rest.. see what i did there? Kai Nicholas? it was the best i could do.
:-)

saf said...

We will miss you. Thanks for the years of good reading.

Joy said...

And here I thought it was just the stress of an election year in your politically mixed marriage, rather than the death of two difficult people who had made your life more difficult than necessary for years. I will really miss reading your blog. If you ever choose to come back, will you announce via Facebook?

deb said...

I'll miss you. The best to you and SH...you deserve lots of fun together.

Erika said...

It's been grand reading, so a huge thank you for sharing, and the best of luck in the future.

Jessica (tc) said...

No, wait! Why don't you just make this blog about pictures of your cats? I'd still tune in, because...cats! (Duh!) ;)

Seriously, though, I understand. I'm going to miss this blog, but I do get the reasons behind it. Good luck to both of you! :)

Anonymous said...

I have been reading both blogs for a while (found via A Femme d'un Certain Age) and had guessed they were written by the same person. Your writing style touches me and with the end of this blog, wanted to ask that you continue to write. If not here, or there, finish your book, please. Escapades so warmly written are a rarity. You have great talent.

You made them so real that I still occasionally wonder whatever happened to the young couple on the bus. --Deb in KY

Class factotum said...

Thank you guys so much for your lovely words. You make me feel great.

I realized after I posted that I did not think it through - I hit "publish" and then left on a three-day business trip without my computer. I read your comments on my phone and they made my sore legs and aching feet go away (well, not really) but I couldn't respond easily!

You have all been fabulous readers. I love to write and to tell stories but even more than than, I love to be read. More later - back to work. :) xoxox

MomQueenBee said...

I will miss you. Thank you for writing, and remember that the internet continues to be open if you ever change your mind.

KJL said...

I have loved your blog and wish you all the best. I'm going to check back now and again in the hope an update might present itself:-)

God speed!
Kris

Sam Sattler said...

It was quite a ride, and I enjoyed getting to know you guys in digital print.

Wishing you both all the best, all I can say is take care of yourself and that I am among many who will miss you.

Sam

Anonymous said...

So sad to hear this. I have been reading your blog for many years. I live in Milwaukee, so have especially enjoyed your witty insights into our city and state. I grew up in New England, so view Wisconsin as a bit of an outsider, as you do.

I want to thank you for telling me about Divine Consign ... I've hauled out my closet (and my mother's, too) over the last three years and made over $1,000!! I sometimes wonder if you are there shopping for purses!

I'm very sorry to hear that your husband's parents disinherited him after all he did for them. My father died last year and he found ways to leave more money to my brother than to me, thinking I wouldn't find out. Add this to your list: "Leave to children equally and disinherit only as a matter of last resort."

Best wishes, Lindy

CF said...

Thanks, Lindy. I am glad I could help you clean out the closets! I have not shopped at DC for a few years, though - I am trying to cut back. :)

How on earth did your dad think you would not find out? Honestly.

Maybe we'll bump into each other at Summerfest.

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Thanks!
Hailey

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Scott McRobie